In the spring of 2001 I was downsized in a mass layoff. It just so happened that my mother was working for an environmental firm in the same business complex. She suggested I send my resume to her because she was the President’s executive assistant. I got the job and the president of the company Terry treated me with professional respect, marveled over my resume, and promised that if I had the drive, I would go very far in this company. I was thrilled.
The harassment started out small. First there were emails that read, “So, do you want to play?” I said “play what?” I deleted the email and shrugged it off. Back in that day, I would laugh off that behavior because that was my only recourse. I couldn’t believe those messages meant anything serious. Terry was a married man with five children! I was so naïve and it took many incidents before I realized what was going on.
I was with the company for a few months when I was invited to an out-of-town environmental seminar and everyone would stay in a hotel. I roomed with the company’s attorney, Catherine. The morning we were leaving the hotel phone rang. Catherine picked it up and handed me the receiver. I had no idea who it was. Surprisingly, it was Terry. He told me that his wife forgot to pack his toothpaste and asked if I would bring mine down to his room. I asked him, “Why don’t you get some from the front desk or have them bring it to you?” He insisted that I come down immediately, and I did what I was told. He was my boss.
When he opened up his door, he was standing there completely wet wearing only a towel. I handed him the toothpaste and backed up several feet. He said, “Do you want to come in?” I stated, “No.” He looked at me as if I was crazy and said, “Oh jeez…I’m not going to do anything to you! Don’t be stupid…”
Terry told me to sit down and relax. I sat down, but I was not relaxed. He pulled out a joint and handed it to me saying, “Here, smoke some of this since you’re so uptight.” I was floored! Not only was my boss smoking weed in front of me, but he offered me some as well! I told him no. He said, “Oh, come on…who am I going to tell? Your mom?”
He started to dress in front of me, while I turned my head. I was sick to my stomach. After about 40 minutes, he finally used my toothpaste and returned it to me. I was free to leave. I ran up the stairs not knowing what I was going to say to Catherine. I walked in the door and she looked at me as if I had done something wrong and said, “Why in the hell were you down there for that long?” I didn’t tell her anything. I was new and I didn’t want to rock the boat or start drama. I was scared of the consequences if I told her about Terry and what he did. Instead I just explained to her that I gave him the toothpaste and he had me sitting there waiting for him. I didn’t tell her that he was only wearing a towel and dressed in front of me. I didn’t tell her that he was smoking a joint and offered me some. I don’t know why I felt I needed to protect him for his actions, but I did and kept my mouth shut.
Terry began to constantly call me into his office telling me to bring a pad and pen. When I showed up I was always ordered to close the door behind me. He explained that he wanted me to take notes about where I was heading in the company. He threw out all these fantastic titles, and what kind of work I could do. He basically told me that I had free reign of my position and he would even let me make up my own responsibilities.
Terry pushed papers towards his pencil holder until they fell in front of his desk. I bent down and picked them up. I was so naïve, I had no clue what he was doing until I noticed him smirking and laughing to himself…as if he was so clever. When I left his office he said, “Turn around.” I asked, “Why?” He said, “I want to use you as a fantasy for when I have sex with my wife.” I was disgusted. To save face he replied, “I’m just kidding girl! Don’t you dare tell your mother about this.”
Soon after that incident, Terry’s wife kicked him out of their house. Lord knows what for. He was living at the Extended Stay Hotel down the street from the office. Early on a Friday night, he called my cell phone and stated that he needed some important papers delivered to him at his hotel. No one else was available to do it so I went back to work, retrieved the papers and drove to the hotel with the intention of leaving them at the front desk. When I walked in he was waiting for me in the lobby. He told me to come with him to his room so he could make sure I brought everything he needed. I was so pissed and angry, but I couldn’t tell him no because he was my boss. I was afraid.
We walked into his room and threw the papers to the side. He removed his shirt and sprawled out on the bed and asked me to sit down. He asked me to sit with him on the bed and I said no. He begged like a little boy to cuddle with him. He said he was lonely after his wife kicked him out. I sat on the edge of the bed and couldn’t look him in the eye. He asked me to give him a massage. I thought, “Are you kidding me!?” I kindly told him no because he was my boss and it wasn’t a good idea. He started crying. I don’t know if they were crocodile tears in order to get me to stay, but the act didn’t work. I said goodbye and left.
My employment changed on Monday when I came back into work. The minute I walked through the front door, I was summoned to Terry’s office. When I walked in, the Vice President of Operations was standing there. Terry cut right to the chase, “Michelle, people are starting to get jealous of our working relationship, so you will no longer be working with me. Don’t knock on my door, don’t come to me with any problems, just don’t. Tim is your new supervisor and if you have problems, go to him.” Mind you, this is nearly 20 years before the #MeToo movement.
I was so relieved that I didn’t have to work with Terry anymore, but the phrase he used, “people are starting to get jealous…” really stuck in my head. A few days later, my mom was “let go” for no apparent reason. Maybe it was because Terry was scared that I would tell my mom what he was doing? And who knows what their in-house attorney Catherine was saying. Maybe she advised it? I no longer worked on the projects that I had been slaving over. I was given a desk in the back of the office with a partition in front of me. I could see no one, and no one could see me. I sat at my desk with absolutely nothing to do. I had literally been stripped of everything I had worked for.
Soon after that I was sent to a new location. It was a storage room where they kept junk and there was one desk. I was ordered that I had to keep the solid metal door shut at all times. I was not allowed to prop the door open. I was not allowed to converse with any of my co-workers. When I did leave my office, I was shunned by every female employee, and snickered at by every male co-worker. I was written up for situations where I did absolutely nothing wrong. I had never been treated in such a negative manner.
I was in a male dominated company and all the men harassed me after this. I was screamed at by a co-worker telling me to quit, go home to my husband and “put some babies in my stomach.” Other guys walked around with pornography and showed it to me waiting for my reaction. Everyone believed that I was screwing the boss. My naivety had morphed into rage. I went to the woman in HR and explained what was going on. It was humiliating having to describe what was happening. I thought that since she was a woman, she would take me seriously. Instead she stared at me in disbelief. She treated me as if I was a liar and I was there to start trouble. I was sorely mistaken when I thought it would be easier to talk to a woman. She shamed me and told me to get back to work. Nothing was going to change. I finally gathered up the courage to tell my mom everything that happened right under her nose. She was livid. She felt guilty for suggesting that I come and work for these degenerates.
I decided to contact a female attorney who specialized in sexual harassment. What a waste of time. She told me that if I went through and filed suit, it would be my word against Terry’s. He had unlimited funds to hire the best attorneys and I had no money. She said that they would dig into my personal life and sexual history, just like a rape victim. She discouraged me from doing anything about it. I don’t know if anything she said was true, but she became condescending as if she didn’t believe me.
I resigned from Lee & Ryan and had my chance to give that HR bitch my final thoughts. I wrote in detail what I endured during my tenure. I was not nice. I did not mince words. I was belligerent. I wanted to make sure this was looked at not just by HR but Terry, my other supervisors, co-workers and the in-house attorney Catherine. I unleashed my rage. All professionalism was out the door. I didn’t care. I was proud of myself for standing up and having the last word. Terry, former president of Lee & Ryan Environmental is a predator and a bad person. I hope someone googles him and sees this article. Not only did I have the last word, but I had the last laugh.
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